I have a conversation with my door,
Whether we want to have it or not.
It is one we have had before,
And it’s one we will have a lot.
I really never start it,
The door always does.
Every time, it asks me to quit
The staring at it because
I let a giggle loose,
Or maybe a sound of despair.
And I am no social recluse,
But I like to be alone, to be fair.
So when I’m watching kitsch things,
Or maybe looking at a book,
My ears create footsteps coming
And I tense for the door to unhook.
I don’t know why I feel this way
(And neither does the door).
But it asks me to look away
And avert my eyes to the floor
Who knows why I’m embarrassed
To emote in my own room
Because at the very barest
It’s a safe place, not a tomb.
I’d like to make a vow
From starting this day on:
I promise to laugh allowed
And sigh the sighs forgone.
For there are only things as small to fear
Behind the face of my door
Than a blush that warms my ears
Or losing what was felt before.