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Creative Writing

A Response from Your Indie Ex-Boyfriend After You Finally Broke Up with Him When He Said He Didn’t like the Kung-Fu Panda Movies

***This poem is inspired by a dream I had last night where I broke up with Finn Wolfhard, except I was Finn Wolfhard watching me break up with me and then wrote a poem like this angstily. Enjoy Finn Wolfhard’s perspective of our heartbreak.***

And now, a reading of the last 70 plus words my girlfriend said to me 

when she broke up with me in her green dirty Chevrolet SUV:

*

You’re exactly who I thought you were

A scheming, pretentious rat

You, a shining star that burns

With a derivative, greasy mullet

*

You think the world revolves around you

Believe me, it’s only the flies

Angular lines that sharpen in lieu

Of the fatty kindness so absent in your eyes

*

Child to grown, no opportunities blown

And now, you’re the crazy big shot

A shot in the dark is better than none

But a miss would have been better than that.

— My ex-girlfriend

*

I wish I could say I miss her

But I’m onto better things

Like people who watch better movies

And don’t lose all their rings.

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